Greetings from the Brotherhood of the Egg
Posted on 20/02/2014 in Fun Stuff
Breaking news, live from the DiscoverKelpies coop in deepest, darkest Edinburgh.
Fowl play was suspected this morning at the newly renamed Hatching Gardens as rumours of feathered fiends attacking the streets of Edinburgh, sorry Hen-inburgh, came to light. Beady eyewitnesses report that adult humans are being snatched by GIANT ROBOT CHICKENS and all signs of resistance from local residents are being pecked out.
An organisation known as the Brotherhood of the Egg has claimed responsibility in response to the release of DiscoverKelpies eggsciting new book, Attack of the Giant Robot Chickens.
All local social media, websites, radio and television have been taken over by the giant robot chickens, and a spokeschicken from the Brotherhood of the Egg delivered the following ominous message at dawn this morning: “Cluck cluckity cluck. Cheep cheep, cluck. Cockledoodledoo.”
For all non-chicken speakers, Cluckle Translate have provided an official translation:
Children of the humans. We, the giant robot chickens, are your new leaders. I know that some of you are still out there and some might even have ideas about fighting back. That is futile. For too long our race, the chicken race, has been enslaved by yours. Now is our time. Now we will break free and take back the world.
You have no chance against us. We will win. So join us now.
You will be safe. You will be cared for. But if you stand against us we will find you. And we will take you.
Worrying news indeed. While unconfirmed reports suggest that an Aberdeen collective known as the Train Gang are fighting back, Hen-inburgh City Coop recommend that all non-poultry lifeforms remain indoors and monitor the developing situation via the DiscoverKelpies Twitter feed, #GiantRobotChickens.
This is Nuria, reporting for DiscoverKelpies. Now over to Henny Penny in the chicken coop.
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